When time doesn't matter - with the Broscious Family

I remember meeting Deanne in the Dulles, Washington airport.  It was almost two years ago.  We were making our first trip over to Ethiopia for court.  There was this woman.... peppy as ever and desperate to take pictures!  I figured she would EXHAUST me on the way over to Ethiopia.  For a minute I wondered why I didn't remember Mike being there... I thought maybe because the memories of Deanne overshadowed him....., but then I remembered I didn't have the privilege of meeting Mike until our second trip.  Deanne traveled with a friend on that first trip for court to meet our girls.

I loved Deanne from the moment I met her.  Mike too.  What a great couple.  Deanne has never met a stranger.  You wouldn't believe the number of people she was talking to on that airplane to Ethiopia.  14 hours later and I bet they were ready to get off the plane :)  Just kidding Deanne!!!  Everyone loves you!

We experienced a lot of the "firsts" in our life with Sara, right alongside Mike and Deanne.  The first time we saw Sara, Deanne was there.  She heard Sara scream at us.  She saw, right along with us, this feisty little bundle of energy, slowly begin to come out of her shell and tolerate us.  In the meantime, we got to watch her interact with little Cambria.  The tiny little thing that would smile without prompting.  She was such a teeny little sprite!  We experienced passing court together - that moment when the judge declared that the girls were ours.  I got to hug the new mom and it was great!  We grieved together as we left for home, leaving our newly declared children behind - as we waited for Embassy approval to bring them home.

Just about a month later, were back in the air... this time with Mike in tow, to be reunited with our girls and bring them home with us forever.  Mike fell right into the groove of the group as if he had been with us all along.  It was great to meet the other half of Deanne.  Oh the laughs we had together!  There are some things you can just never forget... apparently Deanne can't forget when I told her to "Shut Up!!!".  It was said with pure love to a dear friend, I'm sure :)

We got to see Mike hold his daughter for the first time.  We got to experience passing Embassy together.  Our families forever connected, not just by the girls we brought home, but by the friendship that was established in that short time, in a foreign country.  I'm truly amazed at what God does in the adoption process.  Deanne and Mike are an additional blessing God gave us through years of disappointment in adoption.  

Nearly two years later, and we had the privilege to meet up with this wonderful family again.  Deanne and Mike were in Myrtle Beach with their family and we could not pass up the opportunity to have them over.  When they pulled up, it was like two years had never passed.  I hate to admit it, but when I saw Deanne, I cried....like a family member you hadn't been able to see in years, but like not a second had passed.  God made that bond stronger over the years and it was like we were never apart.  

Oh, and the GIRLS.  It did a wonderful thing to my heart to see these two Ethiopian beauties together.  And my how they have changed.  Sara, who was so much larger than Cambria, was now small in comparison.  Sara is a little tiny thing, and Cambria, almost a full year younger than Sara is taller than her and weighs more than her.  To see them together again... I really can't describe it.  They didn't know, at least I don't think they knew, what it meant for the two of them to be in a room together again... how a piece of Ethiopian history came together on the soil in America... they didn't understand, they didn't care, but we did.  The girls were together again.  Someday that would mean something to them.

All the time that passed.... it didn't matter!  Love  you Broscious family!  So thankful God put us on that plane together and the girls in their forever homes at the same time!  Let's do it again soon :)

In Christ,

Charity

Quality Mom Reviews

I've ventured out into a new blog... still keeping this one, but starting another one as well.  Anyone who knows me, knows that I analyze things.  I was just born a critical, analytical thinker.  I put that mindset to good use at work, and I've now found a way to do it at home as well.  

I am always "reviewing" products around my home in my head.  Sometimes, when I'm using a product that claims the world on the label and I use it and it's "not so great", I wonder why someone didn't tell me....

Or... I find the world's best kept secret  in a product, and wonder why someone didn't share it with me.  

I realized though, that I don't share my "thoughts" on products with others either... which lead to the birth of my new blog page

Quality Mom Reviews

I had two product packages delivered to my home today for review.  One for a hair care product (great for ethnic / dry / or heat treated hair) and another set of specialty candles (I love candles).  I'll have those reviews up shortly.  Also, the hair care people were kind enough to send me three of the product that I chose for review - one for me to review, and two to share with you - my friends.  

I'm going to give away the hair care product next week.  In order to enter to receive it (I'll have a picture of it up shortly) go to my blog and "follow it".  You have to do this to be entered.  Share this blog on your blog (leave me a comment and a link to your blog where you shared it) and I'll enter you a second time.  Finally, if you share my blog with your friends on FB (add me as a friend Charity Roach) and I'll enter you a third time.  Next weekend I'll draw two winners and will ship them this fabulous hair care product.

I'm also doing some local (Florence, SC) area reviews.  I've already posted two of those for products I have personally purchased recently.  If you are in the Florence, SC area, and want me to feature your product on my blog / Facebook, you can get in contact with me at 

Quality Mom

I'd love to have the opportunity to review your product and feature it on my blog.

Charity

Sara's Dedication - August 5, 2012

Sara Joy trying on her outfit for her dedication day

What a wonderful day we had today.  Today, after much delay (not by choice, but by circumstance), we had Sara's dedication at church.  As baptists, we don't baptize our children as babies.  We believe that baptism follows only after professing your faith in Jesus Christ.  What we do have for families, are "baby dedications".  Ours was more a "Sara dedication" since she is not a baby... but it's really not about the baby anyway - it's more of a public declaration by the parents to raise the child in the Christian faith.  Our pastor starts with a relevant bible verse, asks the church to support us as we raise our children to love the Lord and then prays with us as a church family.  It is much less formal than say a "baptism", but it means the world to me as a parent.

My family!!!  Love this family!

At our dedication, I was able to publicly recognize that this child - Sara Joy Edom Roach - was a child that was known by God before I ever knew her.  God knew her name before we ever thought of knowing it.  God knows her life story before it is played out.  God knew she would be with us!  It amazes me.  A tragic story turned to beauty by the Lord who loves her and who loves us!  So today, we were able to  "give her back to God" - to recognize that she is HIS.  She is with us only for a season, and ultimately she will go back to Him.  We  are afforded the AWESOME privilege of raising her while she is on this earth and today we promised God that we would do the best we could with the child He entrusted to us.  Cameron and Anna were up in front of the congregation with us.  I feel it's so important to stand as a family, because each of us in the house will influence her life and her walk with Christ.  

Sara Joy Edom Roach - one of my three gifts from God!!!

God has been so good to our family!  It felt so good to stand up and in my mind thank God for the family He has given us, thank Him especially today for Sara Joy and to just stand in awe of the miracle of family that He has given us... not just in our own, small family - but in our extended family, our friends (who are like family) and our church family - our huge, loving, supporting, welcoming church family!  There's nothing like walking in a church and feeling at home!  It's been awhile since we've felt that.  But today, when we were dedicating Sara, I felt it.  We were with family!

Such a happy kid!

I was so happy to share the day with my mom and Denis and Tim's parents - Jim and Mavis.  We are so fortunate to have parents that will get up at the crack of dawn, drive from afar to come to an early morning church service with us, to see their grand-daughter dedicated to the Lord.  After celebrating Sara at her dedication at church, we decided to go to dinner as a family and then came back home for a bit of dessert.  Memories are made by days like today.  I know it took some effort to get everyone here as early as we did... but know that it is appreciated.  I won't forget it, Tim won't forget it and we'll help Sara and the kids remember it.

Sara with her new bible - when we asked her where she got it, she said "from God"  You are SO right Sara!

Now, without further adieu here are some (more) pictures from the day....

A little hazy for some reason, and Cameron is playing "cool", but we don't get many pictures of all of us together, so I decided to keep it up here anyway :)

Seriously love this family!

Sara with her new bible - I guess I should tell her that's a page marker... not a hanger!

I chopped off the top of her head... and she's still cute!

total cuteness

She looks so grown up...

With Grandma and Denis on her special day!

so sweet!

With Mamaw and Papaw on her special day!

sitting like a princess for Papaw

The Roach Family

Anna being silly for the picture

If you add all three of these together - you get a good picture of everyone!

Sara opening a gift from Grandma and Denis - a beautiful dress and a super cute fall outfit!

Sara giving thanks for her gift - to Grandma

Maybe she'll thank Denis too...

Yep - thanking Denis too!

Trying on her necklace from Mamaw and Papaw - which shines more, the necklace or that smile?

Looking at  her necklace....

Sara and Papaw

She was loving up to Papaw...

I think she was trying to absorb God's Word...

Mamaw and Anna - isn't her new haircut cute (Anna's haircut) but Mamaw's is cute too :)

Rockin' some guitar for Papaw!

 I am one truly blessed wife, mom, daughter and daughter in law - I have a GREAT family!  To our Cornerstone family - thank you for walking this journey with us!  It takes a village to raise a child and you guys are an AWESOME support system!


In Christ,
Charity

Why is it assumed that DEBATE EQUATES to HATE?

I wrote this yesterday on Chick-Fil-A appreciation day.... one of the most controversial fast food support days I have ever seen....


All day today, I have been biting my tongue.  It's been hard to do.  I went about my day, doing the things I do... as I waited in the Dr. office, finishing an appointment with Anna, I pulled out my phone and opened up Facebook.  It seemed that all anyone had to talk about was Chick-Fil-A and whether or not they would eat chicken today, or ever again for that matter.  Some, ate chicken three times today.  Some, will never eat chicken again for fear it would somehow support Chick-Fil-A.  Personally, I would have had some chicken today, but I was busy doing some other things.  But to limit your diet because of someone voicing their personal views, is in my mind... silly.


Chicken is chicken.  Money is money.  Support what you want to support.  Don't support it if you don't want to.  But whatever you do  (or don't do)... can't we just take the hate out of it all?  There is no good reason for curse words to be exchanged over CHICKEN!!!!!  Even if my eating chicken means I support something that you don't believe I should support.  I know that there is a lot more behind it than chicken, but it seems to have come to that.  If you were in line at Chick-Fil-A today - even by ACCIDENT, or just because you like their food and were really, really hungry - then from what I saw on FB, you are hated by those who are in agreement with same sex marriage.  Ok, so truthfully, no one would really have waited in the long lines that they had to wait in today, unless they were doing it to support a cause that they believed in.  I've looked through my FB posts and saw many unkind words regarding those who were in line today....as much as people are thinking that those in line are haters - take a look in the mirror.  Thank goodness I was not able to get in line today, or I would be among the list of those who are hated!  By virtue of this post though, I will likely join the ranks..... but keep an open mind first... because I'm not a hater....


I started my own FB post, but it got too long, so I just thought I'd wander over here and put my thoughts here....I'll post it to my friends on FB, because I have nothing to hide, and then they can take the appropriate action, if any, if they feel the need to take me off of their friend list....


If I said I stood in line at Chick-Fil-A today, and if I said I support the fact that a marriage is one man and one woman, how many of you would take me off of your FB friend list?  Be honest.  Don't just "de-friend" me.. be sure to leave me a comment, because I want to know that I should miss you.  Marriage being between one man and one woman is what God intended.  It's what I believe.  Anything else is something other than "marriage".  God made it.  God ordained it.. therefore God can define it.  If you want the legal part of marriage, call it something else, call it anything else, have the same legal rights as marriage, I don't care... but marriage, as God intended is one man and one woman.  I'm not taking a stand on rights associated with marriage (which I feel are civil rights), it's about MARRIAGE!!!  I don't "HATE" people for their differing thoughts - I should just be able to support my personal Christian values publicly without being hated, just like everyone else.  There are groups, public events, fraternities, sororities etc for people who support same sex couples.  Just as you have your right to voice your support, I have mine.  I don't hate you for your views.  I'm not naive, and I understand that there is discrimination that I don't live with (trust me when I say I live with my own), but I don't support that discrimination.  I would not "de-friend" you because you were gay.  I would not say bad things about you.  If you needed help, I would help you.  At one point not too long ago, I was a hiring/firing manager - and I would do neither based on sexual orientation.  I cared more about your work ethic than what you did while off the job.  I value you based on you!  Not what you do behind closed doors.  


That being said, I do have my opinions just as you have yours.  Personally, I'm team God.  I won't water it down, because it's who I am.  I'm not going to push it on you, but I will say that I think, based on the bible, that my God wanted marriage to be one man and one woman.  Do I feel it's sinful otherwise?  Based on the God of my bible, yes?  Can I hate you for it?  Based on the God of my bible, NO!  Should I look down on you, torment you, belittle you, call you names, throw ugly names your way, discriminate against you, berate you or in any way, shape or form HATE you?  NO.  Absolutely not!  That's not my God.  That's not what my God represents, and it's therefore not what I am to represent.  


Would I welcome a relationship like that into my home?  No.  Truthfully, call me protective, call me close-minded... call me whatever, but I won't pretend like I support same sex marriage to my children.  I don't get to make decisions for my children, but the way I raise them can influence their future.  In the end, they have their own decisions to make.  However, if a child is exposed to something, good or bad, it is more acceptable to them.  They are my children to raise, and I will raise them in a way that I feel honors God....even if it offends you a little (or a lot).  While I will not welcome a same sex relationship in my home, and my children will see that - they will also see that I can still love the person.  Can I hate the SIN, but love the SINNER?  Yes.  THAT is what I want my children to see.  Again, it sounds harsh, but it's not something I'm willing to water down.  I'm not team heterosexual, or against team homosexual... I'm FOR TEAM GOD!!!!  Being Team God puts me on a side... so that's where I'll stand.  When I get to heaven, if I responded to any homosexual person in a way that God did not intend me to, then I'll answer to HIM!  Until then, I support the man/woman marriage.


So, when I put the title of this in there, it was not a preview of my views that I would be writing about.  So what was it?  It was really, how I was feeling.  All day, I felt the need to say something, to stand up for what I believe.  Not to bash what someone else believes, or deny them of their right to something, but to state what I believe.  It's not wrong for me to do that.  I understand that my views are conservative, but they are MY views, and I have a right to them.  I have a right to say that they are my views, just as you have a right to say what your views are.  My desire is not to offend others.  My desire is not to represent hate.  My desire is to stand firm in MY beliefs.... as controversial as they may be.  


Many people today do water down what they believe.  They make it palatable to everyone.  Life as a Christian is not meant to be palatable to the non-Christian.  Life as a Christian is not mean to be palatable to a Christian living in sin.  Life as a Christian is only meant to be palatable to those who are willing to live the way God intended us to live.  And even then, for the Christian it is not easy.  Palatable, yes - because we chose and desire to live a certain way.. but certainly not easy.... palatable for those who are willing to change, to grow, to be transformed into the image of Christ.  My beliefs - Love God / Love Others... but that does not mean that I have to reject other parts of the bible that God intended me to follow.  Marriage - one man and one woman is clear to me.  I don't care if God only says it once in the bible (and discusses loving others multiple times over)... if God says it once, then it's enough for me.  And the thing about God that is great (one of the many things) is that He never commands us to do something that we can not carry out.  WE CAN support marriage being one man and one woman, and at the EXACT SAME TIME show Christian love to everyone.  Not only CAN we do it, but He EXPECTS it.  That's MY GOD!


So, now that you know my opinion, if you are in a same sex relationship, what should you expect from me?  You should expect me to treat you with love and respect.  I may not welcome a same sex partnership into my home, but I will treat you with the love and respect that God calls me to.  


Views on any topic, including this one, are personal.  Personal views become discriminatory when  you try to force them on others.  Nothing about supporting Chick-Fil-A and their stand on same sex marriage is discriminatory.  Can you be a same sex couple, go into Chick-Fil-A and expect to be served and treated in the same manner as a male/female couple?  Can you work there?  If the answer is yes, then I don't see the discrimination.  


The legal aspects of marriage are separate from this issue... if you can have health care coverage through your work for your partner, if you can collect benefits if they die, if you can go into the hospital room (because you are not recognized as family)... those are distinctly different than - what is marriage defined as?  Do I support same sex marriage?  Just like you can separate hating a sin and loving a sinner, you too can separate the legal and religious aspects of marriage.  HUMANS made it contractual, humans put restrictions around it - GOD defined it.  God ordained it.  God blesses his definition of marriage.  I think the debate here, is really around the definition of marriage.  Sorry if it's not a popular opinion, but God defined it, and I'm following Him....


I may be saying good-bye now to some who are not in agreement with my opinion.  I have friends who are openly gay who may not be my friends anymore.  That's ok.  It's important to stand up for what you believe in... and it's all I'm doing through this post.  My marriage means enough to me to not water it down.  To make it clear that I personally embrace what God told me marriage is.  That I believe what He wrote is what He wanted... and that the bible doesn't change over time.  People are more accepting now of same sex unions... but God's Word never changes and I'm convinced that my definition of marriage is what He intended... because I got it straight from Him.  40 years from now... 100 years from now.... eternity from now one thing will remain.... God's Word and it will never change.


In Christ,
Charity